10 Signs & how to Stop Being Taken Advantage of in a Relationship
Are you in love with a man/woman? But feel that you are being swallowed up by the relationship which you have with him/her? How would you like to take control of your relationship instead of feeling that you are being taken advantage of? How much happier would you be with yourself if you knew that you could indeed be with someone without losing who you are in the process?
10 Common Signs you are being Taken Advantage of in a Relationship
1. They don’t care about you
If your partner has no interest in trying activities you love or sharing in moments that matter to you. They’re taking you for granted, says Bates-Duford.
Plus, if you keep inviting them to spend time with your friends or family and they refuse because they want to be around their network. It shows a selfish disinterest that won’t progress your relationship.
2. Your Fears are His/Her Tools
When you fall in love with someone, you want to tell them everything that interests you and what your core strengths and weaknesses are. If you carefully analyze, you will find that this person has always had the upper hand when it comes to knowing all about you. In return for the little that he/she shared with you, you gave away way too much information to be used against you when it serves him/her right. So, when he is taking advantage of you, he will know exactly what he needs to win over you and attack you for the very same things that he/she had once praised you. This leaves you confused, and yes, it is difficult to figure out what’s on his/her mind. This sort of confusion that he/she creates is something that works great for his/he moves.
3. Your Partner Spends More Time with others
If your partner seems to have no time for you and your relationship but he makes time for friends and other activities these are not good news. It means doesn’t really appreciate your company and doesn’t have the drive to be with you
4. You Have to do Everything that They Ask You
When a man or a woman who is taking advantage of needs something from you. You will have to be available regardless of whether it is a convenient time or not. Manipulators understand your compassionate and kind behavior and how much it kills you when you cannot be there for the people you love. They use that guilt against you to make you do what they want. The moment you refuse, all hell breaks loose. They make you feel that you are not good enough and that you do not live up to people’s expectations, which is why all the wrong things happen to you. They justify your bad days like that so that the fear created forces you to be there for them whenever they want.
5. They Refuse to Compromise
Relationships require regular work and compromise to make both people happy and to show a willingness to adapt and care for each other.
However, if your partner is refusing to compromise on both big and little issues and always set in their ways, it shows they string you along without thinking of you as a valued factor in the matter, says Fisher.
6. You Find No Solution Confronting Them
Whenever things haven’t worked in your favor. You have tried the most common route, and that is to speak with him/her and tell them what’s bothering you. Now manipulators could not care less about what you have to say. They are the most selfish people around, and no logic of yours will ever work to convince them about the pain that their behavior makes you go through. They have this uncanny ability to turn over everything that you would complain about against you, and in the end, you are prepared to feel like a fool. You will be confused about everything at the end of the conversation because manipulators will make you believe that you are the one to blame for everything.
7. They Criticize Your Quirks
Maybe your partner used to love the way you chewed your gum or how you laughed during a movie. But if now it’s an annoyance, they do not appreciate you for you the way they used to.
“You might notice your partner finding your little quirks less cute. They might even annoy them. That’s a sign they are taking you for granted,” says Morgenstern.
8. Your self-worth is at a Low
Manipulators taking advantage of you will always have you believe that you are not good enough. You will be told all the negative things that will make your confidence hit an all-time low. You start questioning your merit and worth. They make you feel like you cannot reach the level that they are in. They will have you believe that nothing that you think or do is capable of winning over them. Your value is diminished. You will be convinced that only when you can please them, you are competent enough and without them, you hold no standing in the world.
9. You Are at the Receiving End of Abuse
When a partner is taking advantage of you and feeding you on insecurities. He will do everything to hurt you so that you are left feeling weak and shattered. Your vulnerability helps them dominate your life. They get angered at a moment’s notice and resort to abusing you both physically and emotionally. It is easier for them to control you since you will be pushed to the point of fearing them, and you would do everything to save yourself from such an embarrassment. You might be so blinded in love that you would find it difficult to see and understand beyond what they have you believe.
10. You Feel Used
This will be the biggest sign. Yes, the other signs are also significant, but if you feel that you’re being used. Well, you got your answer. You should never go against your gut instinct. especially when you get the feeling something is not right. If you feel it, you are right.
Things which you have to do to stop Being Taken Advantage of in a Relationship
If you are ready to take control of your relationship today then here are three things which you have to do…
The first one is to asses where you stop and where he/she begins. It is typical of people who are in relationships where they are being controlled to have a blurred sense of personal boundaries. Sit down and decide what parts of your life you have handed over to him/her, what choices he/she has made that you need to be making and what emotions you are feeling that you believe he/she is ‘making’ you think.
When doing this, it is, to be honest with yourself about the part that you may be playing in giving him/her control. Are you saying: “I don’t care, whatever you want to do.” When you go out with him/her? You find that when you are angry or sad or upset that you are always looking at him/her to make it right? Are there things which he/she says that you are doing wrong that you honestly feel that are not wrong?
If so, you need to reassert your responsibility for these things. Do not wait for him/her to change. That is giving him/her control all over again. Set some standards for yourself and stand by them. Let him/her decide whether or not he/she thinks they are OK with him/her but don’t change if you feel that you are betraying yourself in doing so.
You are not responsible for another person’s standards, expectations, or perceptions. If he/she feels that you should be that is not your problem. Put a higher value on yourself and be responsible for the areas where you may have given up control. This will empower you to take control of your relationship immediately.
You’re willing to overlook the ill effects of your helping and giving because it makes you feel or look like a “good” person. You should pull back from “helping” that isn’t truly helpful to the recipient and is more about you proving to yourself or others what a right person or family member you are, how selfless you are, or how nice you are.
Give up the “I am a good person” lifestyle and adopt the ” I am what I am” fully knowledgable. Love yourself first. You are going to be like a magnet afterward. No one wants to see these signs of being taken advantage of in a relationship. It sucks. Simply. If you are noticing your partner showing these signs, it is time to reassess your relationship.
I love you all! Stay on the good path!!