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Enhancing your Sense of Self Esteem

Self-esteem is at times referred to as self-respect or self-worth. Having a healthy sense of self-esteem is critical in ensuring that you navigate the challenges of life successfully. Having too little self-esteem can have devastating effects on how you view life.

It may leave you feeling defeated and unworthy of anything. As a result, it is possible for you to find yourself making choices that are bad for you. For example, a person with a low sense of self-esteem may find themselves persisting in an abusive relationship despite the hurt and humiliation they go through. Low self-esteem is a crippling state of mind that curtails the affected person from realizing his or her full potential.

On the other hand, a grandiose sense of self-worth can also be damaging. This is what is exhibited by persons with narcissistic personalities. This kind of self-esteem puts off other people and is usually damaging to personal relationships. People with a grandiose sense of self-esteem are usually manipulative and self-centered. They are incapable of establishing meaningful relationships with the people around them.

Attain a Balance in Self-esteem

Esteem levels that are either too low or too high are harmful. It is, therefore, important that you attain a balance & uphold a realistic but positive view of yourself at all times. People who propagate a healthy sense of self-esteem from an early stage of life are more likely to handle conflict and other life challenges better than those who lack a sense of self-worth. However, having a positive view of oneself is easier said than done for the majority of people. This is mainly because we grow up in different circumstances and go through different experiences.

A child whose views and thoughts are not respected and acknowledged by his or her parents might suffer from self-esteem issues as he or she grows up. As a result, the child might develop a number of antisocial traits such as violence and drug abuse. These things might hold back a person from succeeding in life. The need for self-esteem does not only help you achieve in school; it helps you achieve in your workplace and helps you form meaningful relationships with fellow human beings.

All these things play a paramount role in ensuring that you are able to attain the goals you have set for yourself.

What are the signs of a healthy sense of self-esteem?

Telling you how to boost your self-esteem needs first to point out sure-fire signs of a healthy one. Below are a few signs you will start to exhibit once you cultivate a healthy sense of self:

  • You will develop confidence in yourself
  • You will develop the ability to say NO
  • You will have a positive outlook for things regardless of your circumstances
  • You will be able to accept yourself by analyzing your strengths and weaknesses
  • Your overall perspective of self will not be influenced by negative events
  • You will be able to develop the ability to articulate your needs clearly

What are the signs of a low sense of self-esteem?

It is also important to point out signs of a low sense of self-esteem so that you may be able to self-diagnose effectivelyRemember, the secret to conquering yourself is to know yourself and your enemy. According to General Sun Tzu, in the art of war, if you know thy enemy and know thyself, you need not be afraid of the outcomes of a hundred battles. In the same vein, Socrates once said that to know thy self is the beginning of wisdom. For you to effectively deal with your esteem issues, it is important that you know them. Below are signs of low self-esteem:

  • You have a negative perspective of life
  • You lack confidence
  • You are unable to express your needs clearly
  • You mainly focus on your disabilities
  • You have excessive feelings of shame, anxiety, and depression
  • You believe others are your betters
  • You have an abnormal fear of failure
  • You have problems accepting positive feedback
  • and more

     ♦     How Do I Gain Back My Sense of Self-Esteem?

The journey towards establishing a healthy sense of self-worth is like the journey to Ithaca, Ulysse took. Full of adventures and wondering but with courage and determination, there is light at the end of the tunnel. Contrary to popular belief, courage is not the absence of fear; it is moving forward despite the fear! I

  • You must learn to be kind to yourself

Your head’s little voice that tells you that you are fine is very powerful: do not doubt it. If you fall, make an effort to stand up and be positive about it. You can do this by identifying the lessons you got from falling. The rule of thumb in this matter is to try to speak to yourself the way you speak to a person you love.

  • Always be yourself

By trying to be like other people, you will find that you will always fail miserably. This may injure your self-esteem. Try to focus on your aspirations and achievements rather than comparing them or yourself with other people. It is important to remember that we have different paths in life. We are also gifted differently and this is what makes you unique as an individual. While doing this, it is important that you do not view other people’s success as your failure.

  • Work on your self-image

It is known well that engaging in exercises is a great way to find motivation. It inculcates the ability to set realistic goals and will have a tremendous effect on helping you find the confidence you need in life.  Additionally, breaking sweat causes your body to produce endorphins. Endorphins are feel-good hormones. Self-image though is not one thing. Is a variety of things but mostly is inner work. Start from outside and go inside if you cannot do the opposite, but remember that your body is NOT YOU. Certainly working with your body can help you tremendously, because we have two ways to achieve a state of being. Outside -inside and visa Versa.

  • Accept that you are not perfect

At the end of the day, we are humans; this means we are inherently perfect in our imperfections.  According to Buddhists, to be human is to be limited, fallible, and imperfect. You are here to work towards the Higher.  Once you accept this truth, you will be able to work towards bettering yourself.

  • Do the things that make you joyous

Spending time doing the things that make you feel happy and fulfilled will have a great effect on how you view life. People who do the things they love are apt to have a positive view of life. For example, if you are an artist and find yourself in an accounting firm, you may find yourself underperforming and depressed. This may cause you to have low self-esteem. Choose what makes your heart sing.

  • Seek Peace

Is not a secret that when you feel Peace inside you everything else comes effortlessly. It is not easy to attain peace but you Must seek peace. Is a rule of thumb that whoever is looking for problems he will find them. When you are in Peace you can easily understand the illusion of identity and thus will have an extreme boost of self-esteem.

  • Celebrate your achievements

This is very important during the journey towards achieving a healthy sense of self-esteem. Any achievement, no matter how small, should be celebrated. It is needless to say that the celebrations should be reasonable lest you lose track of what is ahead. Celebrating your achievements will help you build your confidence; it will, ultimately, help you feel better about yourself. This precious self waits for you to acknowledge his uniqueness and glory.

At this point, I acknowledge you for being here and trying to be better and better.



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